I was down in Savannah
Eating cream and bananas
When the heat just made me faint
I began to get cross eyed
I thought I was lost I'd
Begun to see things as they ain't

As the relatives gather
To see what's the matter
The doctor came to see was I dying
But the doctor said
Give him jug band music
It seems to make him feel just fine

I was told a little tale
About a skinny as a rail
Eight foot cowboy with a headache
He was hung up in the desert
Swapping rats
And trying to get a drink of water
With his knees a getting mud caked

And I'll tell you in a sentence
How he stumbled into Memphis Tennessee
Hardly crawling, looking dust baked
We gave him little water
A little bit of wine
He opened up his eyes
But they didn't seem to shine
And the doctor said
Give him jug band music
It seems to make him feel just fine

So if you ever get sickly
Get sis to run quickly
To the dusty closet shelf
And pull out a washboard
And play a guitar chord
And do a little duet yourself

Call on your neighbors
To put down their labors
And come and play the hardware in time
Cause the doctor said
Give him jug band music
It seems to make him feel just fine

I was floating in the ocean
Greased with suntan lotion
When I got wiped out by a beach boy
He was surfing when he hit me
But jumped off his board to get me
And he dragged me by the armpit
Like a child's toy

As we staggered in to land
With all the waders eating sandwiches
We tried to mooch a towel from the hoi poloi
He emptied out his ear drums
I emptied out mine
And everybody knows
That the very last line is
The doctor said
Give him jug band music
It seems to make him feel just fine

And the doctor said
Give him jug band music
It seems to make him feel just fine.

